haywire

\HAY-wyre\

adverb or adjective

1 : being out of order or having gone wrong

2 : emotionally or mentally upset or out of control : crazy

this is an intriguing juxtaposition of definitions. i think i have only ever heard the term HAYWIRE in describing a system that has totally lost control. actually, it's usually an entire network.

the whole mainframe has gone HAYWIRE.

it's also usually in the present perfect tense, suggesting essentially that the damage is done. nothing is ever "about to go HAYWIRE" or "in the process of going HAYWIRE." it's just done. toast.

this makes me curious about part two.

he has gone completely HAYWIRE.

mental faculties: gone.

the word actually comes from the use of bail wire (as in, wire that binds bails of hay) to temporarily fix something. i'm picturing a brain bound up like a bail of hay. i mean, i guess it kind of is.

so, what i'm saying here is that we are all crazy. heads full of hay.

(it's the last two days of the school term; you will have to forgive me)