ponderous

\PAHN-duh-rus\

adjective

1 : of very great weight

2 : unwieldy or clumsy because of weight and size

3 : oppressively or unpleasantly dull : lifeless

When I think PONDEROUS, I think ponder : to consider, meditate, or weigh carefully in the mind. In Merriam-Webster's example sentence, they call a textbook PONDEROUS in contrast to its electronic counterpart. I am not thinking in objects. I am thinking in ideas, emotions, thoughts. The textbook is not as PONDEROUS as the dread of its size, the annoyance at its cumbersomeness, the impatience toward its short shelf life, the realization of its obsolescence, the oppression of its contents.

But—maybe I shouldn't get deep so early in the morning. There's a high of 92 degrees today. I should save my energy for sweating.

Things of a PONDEROUS nature:

- going as a date to someone else's work party

- the magazine selection in the waiting room at a dentist's office

- watching a tennis match on television

- the banter between two DJs on the top 40 station a.m. radio show

- the last two minutes by the time-clock before punching in to work

Reading over this list, I would consider all of the above items to be not only unwieldy or oppressively dull, but also depressing. I wonder if the decline into sadness is inherent to the PONDEROUS. Probably. I can't imagine why any weighty or cumbersome or brutally dull thoughts would inspire joy or serenity.

Boy, you're gonna carry that weight, carry that weight a long time.