1 : to hold in or reduce to slavery
2 : to hold spellbound : charm
i find myself frequently using this word in my writing, but always in the past tense, ENTHRALLED, as in having been spellbound, opposed to doing the act of the spellbinding. i don't know if i am capable of ENTHRALLING another; if so, it has never been revealed to me.
the frequency of the past-tense usage is sort of reflexive of the word itself. i suppose if i am mesmerized i cannot actively realize such a thing is occurring. i can't imagine, at any point, myself saying:
this image is ENTHRALLING me AS WE SPEAK.
this would never happen. the act of being ENTHRALLED seems to inherently prevent such an immediate realization.
the last time i was ENTHRALLED was the last time i was at the oregon coast. it was fall, chilly but sunny, muddy and crisp all at once. brody and i walked through a thick area of pine trees and vines to finally reach a cliff. we stood there for a long time looking out onto the ocean. we were both always totally mesmerized by the coast and the water. we still are, i suppose, just separately now.
i remember getting scared, feeling not only on the precipice of land, but also of thought, as if about to plunge off the edge of consciousness into something unknown.
i have to go. i'm getting overwhelmed.
(he laughed) that's good. that's how you should feel.
still i was scared, like i am sometimes walking over the burnside bridge. and i realize how close i am to the edge of everything, all the time.