Friday, February 12, 2010

phony


\FOH-nee\

adjective

: not genuine or real: as a (1) : intended to deceive or mislead (2) : intended to defraud : counterfeit b : arousing suspicion : probably dishonest c : having no basis in fact : fictitious d : false, sham e : making a false show: as (1) : hypocritical (2) : specious

on long school days, when i spend most of my time reading in the library, i usually bring a tea bag and a mug so i don't have to spend $1.85 on drink to keep me warm. i stop at the little makeshift Starbucks in the student union to get some hot water. the girl with short, wavy brown hair and glasses that is always at the bar asks: do you just need water? i nod. she moves fast, grabs the mug out of my hand, fills it up and passes it back to me. i feel like i'm in slow motion. i make my way over to the condiment bar to put some honey into my Tazo White Berry Blossom—wimpy for the morning, but ideal in the afternoon.

sugar...sugar in the raw....simple syrup...packets of lemon juice...splenda....equal....

honey flavored syrup.

i return to the girl with the brown waves. she's busy, always doing three things at once. i don't want to disturb her graceful rhythm.

do you need something else?
do you guys have any regular honey?
no, only the honey flavored syrup at the bar.

i return and stare at the pump bottle of amber liquid. people with white paper cups of frothy milk push around me to get to the sweeteners and the stir sticks. i strain my eyes to see the ingredients: water, sugar, honey, natural and artificial flavors. i'm getting anxious. people are moving so fast and i'm standing still. i can't bring myself to do it.

why not just honey? is it too sticky, too hard to manipulate? was it deemed too slow for the Starbucks condiment bar?

let's develop a syrup that tastes like honey, but moves twice as fast, satisfying the needs of the tea drinker on the go.

i cannot accept this. i want honey. i don't want some PHONY replacement with a taste not worth the time saved during its distribution.

i cannot help but see this in the bigger scheme—a movement toward speed and convenience. i lose honey because others want to gain time. time for what? what is everyone doing with all this time that they save? does it just add up and get redeemed to add a few days on to the end of your life?

i'd rather just enjoy some honey now while i'm young.

1 comment:

  1. honey by day, duffy by night? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XLs1LG6Ryyk

    ReplyDelete